Here it is a cold and dark night in Portland,
... and I decide that I will believe what I read in the paper and check out this new electronica series at a local bar. Since one of the cars is out of commission and we are running around anyhow, B drops me off and goes and does some shopping for an hour while I check it out.
Turns out its not just one band but two, one in the front area of the bar, and the other in the rear area. OK, I think, two bands for five bucks, how bad can it be?
Pretty bad as it turns out.
I poke my head in the front room of the bar, and I see a guy kneeling over a rather substantial rack of equipment – two moogerfoogers, a couple of mixers, a rack full of fx, a Les Paul, an ancient GR-1 guitar synth, a Red Sound DarkStar and an electrified oud. I thought, wow, that could be amazing, since there was another guy next to him with a rack with an E-bow on the top and a home built looking modular synth to boot. Did I mention the theremin? It looked like they were setting up though, and all I hear was some background noise so I went to the back room.
In the back room there was a real stage, unlike in front where everything was pretty much splayed around on a spot cleared on the floor.
There was even more gear back here. I saw more than this: two Kaos pads, some sorta Electrix FX box, another DarkStar, some DJ equipment, several mixers, a couple of racks of fx, an oxygen keyboard and of course the obligatory laptop. Tons and tons of great shit, and I really couldn’t see all of it. Oh yeah, and about five different circuit bent mutated kids toys – a real collection of them.
I settle in with my beer and wait for something cool to happen. Three guys on the stage, one way behind the laptop, one buried in the middle and the third stage front, messing with the circuit bent stuff.
Throbbing bass line and drum loops, plus noise from the toys for lets say a long time. Eventually, another drum loop and a slightly different drum beat. I’m getting restless, ya know? And its not like there are 100 people in here getting grooved out.
After about 20 minutes, I think, this is really going nowhere, I don’t hear much development in the music and I am bored watching the guy in front bending over to mess with the circuit toys. I think – maybe the band in front is ready.
Out I go and lo and behold, a change: on of the guys in the front room is bending down over the gear on the floor and is twisting knobs. And twisting knobs. I hear a low throb, not really a beat, and long slow pulses of electronic sounds. The bendover guy keeps twisting knobs, not much changes and finally he gets up and walks away. And the sound continues on without much change.
Meanwhile his partner is messing with the banana plugs on his modular synth, alternating that with playing with the E-bow he has set up on top of his rack, banging it and scratching near it, and the echo/reverb just fills up everything.
This goes on for a very long time. I get and drink another beer. Its not like I am missing much, and neither are the five other people there, probably friends of the band out to be nice, ya?
I keep looking at my watch, thinking, at least the beer is good or thinking, maybe I just don’t get what they are doing or thinking maybe I am just too old or thinking if I had a gig here someone could be just a bored watching me………..mostly I’m thinking, at least the beer is good, and if what I was watching/listening too was 1/100th as good as the beer, life would be A-OK.
But who am I kidding? To me, this stuff just sucks, unless I was chemically influenced by more than alcohol and I’m not. I don’t wonder that many people think electronic music cold and uninviting – I just don’t get off on the non-performance aspects of this, especially when the music, such as it is, just bores the piss out of me. I mean, when is something gonna happen????? Where the hell is Yello when I need them????????????????????